


Dream; I’m here my sweet Angel

by orphan_account



Series: TXT One-shots/ short stories [7]
Category: TOMORROW X TOGETHER | TXT (Korea Band)
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Kang Taehyun-Centric, M/M, Nightmares, Polyamory, Soft Boys, They’re just whipped for each other, Whipped Choi Beomgyu, Whipped Huening Kai, Whipped Kang Taehyun, beomgyu and Kai r taehyun’s moon, implied suicidal thoughts, short angst fluff, talking it out
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-02
Updated: 2020-11-02
Packaged: 2021-03-09 04:21:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,787
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27344992
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Taehyun is spiralling again and scared but Beomgyu and Kai are always there to help him. They’re his moons that shine brightly. The people that keep him going and sane.
Relationships: Choi Beomgyu/Huening Kai, Choi Beomgyu/Huening Kai/Kang Taehyun, Choi Beomgyu/Kang Taehyun, Huening Kai/Kang Taehyun
Series: TXT One-shots/ short stories [7]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1856041
Comments: 2
Kudos: 47





	Dream; I’m here my sweet Angel

**Author's Note:**

> I haven’t proof read and honestly idek what this is but enjoy...

His sleeps were cursed with nightmares. They were simple in nature. But it was those simple ones that were the most terrifying. It was the same train. The train that allowed him met Beomgyu and Kai. Except he was alone. It gave the illusion as if he hadn’t seen them in ages but they still weren’t there. Again.

They weren’t there.

Taehyun was alone on the train.

In the darkness.

The train kept going. There was nothing outside. Just a never ending tunnel. A never ending maze of darkness.

Alone. You’re alone. Alone. Alone. Alone.

Taehyun let out a silent scream as the words played like a broken recorder in his mind. It felt like a never ending chant. Slowly enticing him to believe it.

He knew it was illogical, he knew that he wasn’t alone. At least not in real life. He’d then wake up panting and on the verge of a panic attack. It was hard to keep the panic and fear at bay. He was having the dreams over and over again.

He tried going on walks, drawing or trying to do something relaxing. No improvement seemed to stick for long. It would all go down south after a while.

The thoughts stayed, ran rampant in his mind. Never under his control. He could feel the control he had in himself slowly loosen. He was scared that he would slowly lose control and do something. Go back to his old habits. Habits that he managed to control and keep sane after meeting his Luna’s. His moons.

He knew. He could only watch from a far as Beomgyu and Kai laughed, ran, care free. He could never be like that. Never smile or laugh like that.

His life was surrounded, by shadows and darkness of his own demons. But it made sense. While they were clearly the bright beautiful moon, he was a fading star. Alone. Slowly fading into the darkness.

They were the moons that he could only look as from afar.

\---------------------

He would walk up the small hill in their neighbourhood a place where no one knew or went. A single willow tree was at the peak, alone like him. The only part of the city where you could get a clear view of the moon. He would lay on the grass right under the tree as he gazed at the moon which reminded him of his own lovers.

Somehow he would fall asleep from time to time. It was a habit he picked up once the nightmares started. He would be awake rather than asleep most of the time. No matter how positive he tried to be in the morning at night nothing got better. It was hard to accept it. Say it out loud. But he knew. Things were starting to crumble and break. Slowly but surely.

Beomgyu and Kai tried to understand. After all everyone has their insecurities. But it was hard. After all they were moon light, bright smiles and galaxy eyes. No matter how much you tried to knock them down they would come back up. Stronger and more determined. They were strong. He wasn’t.

He was star dust. Small. Light. Weak. Surrounded by darkness. Something you can’t see without darkness. Always followed by it.

But he knew. They were worried. It wasn’t like he was trying to hide. He was too tired to hide. The signs were obvious but it was hard. He could hear their hushed whispers and see the worried glances. Trying to figure out what to do. It’s always hard to figure out what to do in these situations. People were complicated but emotions were even more complicated.

Do they give space? Do they ask if he was okay? (He clearly wasn’t) Do they ask him to explain? They were words and questions spoken in hushed whispers and texts.

He had woken up. Once again alone and in the darkness. He quickly shock his head and started to head down the hill. 

It was disorienting. He could feel himself slowly dissociating from his body. He felt cold, dark and empty. He knew he had to get home quickly. He need them. He needed them to keep himself sane.

\----------------------

It was late when he got home. He could see the light still on faintly room their share bedroom. He slowly made his way to the room. Opening the wooden door slightly as he peeked through.

“Me sorry,” Was what he said instead of greeting him. He felt like he was intruding. So instead he opted to hovering over the door.

“No no, baby pleased don’t be,” Beomgyu instantly stood up and made his way to Taehyun. Opening the door wide. “Are you okay?”

Was he okay? He honestly didn’t know. He wished Beomgyu was asleep. Or that he knew how to answer. Or what to answer with.

“Baby…” Beomgyu snapped him out of his thoughts again. “Are you okay?” He repeated the phrase. “You seem out of it. Our also cold.”

“Fell asleep.” Taehyun managed to squeeze out. Beomgyu nodded. Instantly figuring out that Taehyun was in one of those headspaces. One where he preferred to stay silent. Just trying to talk would be tiring. He had been in that headspace from time to time. When everything got too overwhelming or draining.

They let him be. They knew something was wrong during those times. But they never pushed him to tell. Instead opting to give silent reassurance and love. Honestly that was probably the only thing keeping Taehyun from giving up and keeping him sane and grounded.

Taehyun felt a pair of familiar arms wrap around his waist from behind. Instantly knowing who it was. Kai.

“Where did you sleep? Its late baby,” Kai finally spoke.

“Under the tree.”

“Again? You only do that when it gets really bad. Do you want to talk about it?”

“Yes? No? I don’t know?” It was as if all his restraints were let lose as his throat constricted slightly and tears were let lose. “I want to… it’s not like I don’t trust you. It just so…” It’s so cold, dark, lonely, scary, I don’t want this. He had a thousand words to say but somehow he couldn’t say them.

Instead He tried to calm his breathing and not cry. He stared at the light. 

He had his fingers in his pocket. Continuously pressing the home button on his iphone.

“Let’s get some midnight snacks,” Kai interrupted Taehyun’s panic. A random unexpected question putting a halt to his thoughts.

“Where?”

“I’m sure some place is open right now.” Beomgyu said.

“You should sleep. You have class tomorrow.”

“You know I wouldn’t be able to anyways. Plus, we gotta make sure you’re okay,” Kai mumbled as he rubbed his face in the crook of Taehyuns neck. Lightly giving Taehyun belly rubs and kissing his cheek.

“Let’s go,” Beomgyu kissed Taehyun lightly, hugging him from the front. Taehyun sighed, still hesitant before melting into his boyfriends warmth.

“Okay.”

They found a small café still open near them. Close enough to walk there. It wasn’t anything different really. The walk there was filled with Beomgyu and Kai talking about their classes and work while Taehyun kept quiet. But their voices and their hands interlocked in his own kept him grounded.

They found a hidden corner of the small empty café. Taehyun sat on one corner with Kai next to him and Beomgyu across. They ordered some hot chocolate and cakes as he waiter come by.

“I’m sorry,” Taehyun apologised for the millionth time that night. For what? He didn’t know. Maybe for being so much… maybe for worrying them… maybe just for being himself.

“We, we should be the ones sorry Tae,” Beomgyu reached across the table, holding Taehyun’s hand and rubbing calming circles.

“He’s right. We should have done something. Sooner. We’re sorry for failing you Hyunnie,” Kai added. He had grabbed Taehyun’s older hand. Giving it a reassuring squeeze.

Taehyun stared blankly at the two of them. “Me scared.” He finally spoke, admitting it out loud. “Keep having nightmares. The thoughts won’t go away. I don’t know what to do anymore.”

Taehyun finally let out all the tears. He trembled slightly. He felt stupid. He knew he should be happy. He had people around him. He had people that loved him and cared for him. He wasn’t lonely. Life was okay. Well meant to be okay.

He knew. But those thoughts wouldn’t shut up. It was scary. Why wouldn’t those thoughts just go away? He tried so much…

He tried to rub his eyes. Trying to calm down. But soon he felt two bodies pressed against him. Without him noticing Beomgyu had came next to him. Both Kai and Beomgyu were hugging him.

And he cried.

Finally letting out everything that he tried to supress. Finally letting himself feel the emotions that he tried to hide. Letting them out.

The food arrived at some point. They had ate, not breaking contact.

The whole night was a blur. A spur of the moment. Taehyun could only really remember the reassurance that both Kai and Beomgyu said as he continuously apologised.

“You’ll be okay,” Kai had whispered.

“We’ll be with you all the way. We’ll be with you until you are. We’ll never let you go,” Beomgyu had added. That was all he remembered.

And one thing. He was never alone. Beomgyu and Kai always stayed by his side. Even when they reached home. They never left.

\-------------

The next day was spent with Beomgyu staying by his side. If it wasn’t him it was Kai. He was never left alone. It was nice. A day filled with sweets, movies and smiles. The night filled with hushed whispers of love and cuddles.

They never spoke of last night but Taehyun knew. Knew that the two had talked at some point before. But it was nice to not be in the darkness, nice to not be lonely. Nice to be cared for and loved.

\-----------

The thoughts never completely left. They wouldn’t. But Taehyun tried. Tried to convince himself that they weren’t true. That he was loved. That his life was full of light. It was hard. Harder than most would expect. But he tried. Never giving up.

And on days where he felt like giving up. To just stop he would have someone to talk to him. To hug him. To love him.

He had his two moons.

He would be okay. Someday. Not today and not instantly. 

But someday he will be okay. He knew.

Because he had learnt, that even surrounded by darkness a star can shine bright. That it was only possible to shine so bright because of the darkness.

**Author's Note:**

> Hi :D
> 
> Lmao this is me projecting on Taehyun but I hope u enjoyed!!


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